#DreadedDecember: Home is Where the Hea…. JK I Don’t Have One

23 Dec

A home that is! 

This December is was the first time I went to my hometown since my parents sold their house in August. My last memory had been driving away from the only home I have ever known with the feeling of “now what?”

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This is the last image I have of my home.

Once I decided to go back this month, I called one of my best friends to make sure I could crash at his place before I made all of my arrangements. I have stayed at his house a TON of times and his entire family is SOO welcoming to me. I always enjoy staying with them, but at the end of the day, I am still a guest. It’s not my house, it’s not my stuff, it’s not my dog, and it’s not my home. 

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This is my puppy!!!

When I was in town, I drove past my old home. I usually wouldn’t have done that but I knew I had to write this blog so I went for it. 

It looks the exact same from the outside, except the fact that there is now a HUGE dumpster in the drive way. From what I could see, it looked like the entire inside had been gutted. 

I thought I would feel awful when I was in front of the house, and I definitely was sad… but I was okay. 

What I felt the worst about was the fact that I didn’t have a place to go. I had arrived an hour and fifteen minutes early to my first appointment in town. I couldn’t just go home, play with my dog and waste a little time, and that’s when it all got to me. 

I am still sad that when I go “home”, I don’t really have a home, but I am also so thankful for my friends’ generosity in trying to give me a “home” when I visit.

–Elena 

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